these last days.

so, i'm just gonna sum up the days i've been away.

saturday went quiet well. usually, i am the total breakfast-lover. there are people who dont like eating in the mornings but i always feel like i have to have breakfast. WRONG. we (bf+me) got up pretty late and i didnt eat a thing until 4pm or so. then his mum made some green beans and croquettes and we ate. i had a small portion and was fine with that. later we made curds with strawberries. totally love that. and in the evening i ate some sweets, but im gonna post that later.
i think i had a total of 700-800 cals that day.

sunday wasnt that good.no breakfast and then i had a muffin at a coffee shop, a few french fries for lunch, dinner: salad and half a wrap. and 2 cookies as snack. must have been about 1000cals or more.
we were walking around the whole day, but anyway i regret eating the wrap. i wasnt hungry at all, but i didnt want my bf to "have to" eat alone.
at the night i had a terrible migraine-attack and i am stupid enough to not think about taking painkillers with me. honestly, i though my head was going to split or so. i cried and really wanted to die.(punishment for the many cals maybe..) so i couldnt even do my "Daily Workout" currently consisting of 100 crunches.

TODAY:
i dont even wanna think of how many cals i ate. had a kebap, at about 4cookies (shoot me for that!) and a mcflurry. heard right. mcflurry. oh, and 4 painkillers.
my excuse for all of that food is, that i wasnt feeling good at all. i still felt some pain at the back of my head and i was terrified it might get worse again. so i bought painkillers and took one..then two..and they didnt seem to help much. i ended up with 4 and felt sort of dizzy the whole day.

shopping was fine though, as the whole trip was. i only bought some accesoires, basics, a bag and a boyfriend blazer. wide things. my boyfriend noticed and was like "hey, try these jeans, try that skirt." but i didnt wanna. wheres the use in buying jeans when i look fat in them and, hopefully, i a few month they'll be tottering cause they're too big.
even if the night at the hotel wasnt really romantic (thx migraine!!) the whole trip showed me that me and my bf sort of belong together and that cheers me up so much. we're together since almost 3 years now and i've been doubting our relationship a lot the last few month. now i'm just happy. and i hope that this hapiness fills up my fcking stomack so that there's no room for food tomorrow!
i think i didnt gain (at least not much) but i wanna try to lose 1kg til friday! anyone with me??





b/w thinspo for today. cant comment these. they're just so beautiful.